Requisite 2007 Top 10 List

In the spirit of wrapping things up, here’s my official why I love living in China Top 10 List. There are definitely ups and downs, but I wouldn’t change the overall experience if somebody paid me. Unless that payment included a job with a future and a life plan.

Ok, here we go.

10) My host family: Despite getting woken up on Saturday mornings by the piano as Jerry pounds out some songs before her lesson, this is a great living situation. I get my own room, complete with bunk bed, coat hanger in the shape of a big yellow pencil, and  princess stickers leftover from when this was Jerry’s room. Theres a housekeeper who cooks and cleans, and I can come and go as a please. And its rent free! I just help out with some English homework, and converse in English. That’s my native language! Its easy. Plus, I get to experience all the little Chinese remedies, like Ginger and Brown sugar tea when I was sick.

9) Guys Night at Moon River Diner: This fine Western establishment pours out free beer for the gentleman all night, as long as you buy dinner. Which is a reasonable 5 dollars or so. Free beer! Its nonsense. And the girls all end up coming too, because the Western girls are really at a disadvantage here as the Chinese girls put up a hard fight for the attention of Western guys. Can anyone tell me anywhere else in the world where there is a deal this good?

Characters: I don’t mean the crazy lady in leopard print named Caddy, or the 90 year old man with wayward mole hairs, i mean 汉子。 Its everywhere, its confusing, but it gives me something to do and try to figure out. Like a giant puzzle.

7) Eye contact: I make a conscious effort to stare back at anyone I catch gazing, never-so-subtly in my direction. Next time I have a job interview, I will have no problems maintaining good eye-contact as to appear whole-heartedly enthused about the job.

6 ) Part time work: Does this need to be explained? Leisure time. Gym time. Movie time. And I still saved enough to live for the next six months unemployed.

5) Chinglish: There is no shortage of it around, and sometimes it can be quite profound, almost poetic. Sometimes just unnecessarily wordy, like the cigarette shops, which all proclaim: The Tabbaconist of the Shanghai Tabacco Sales Network Group. Or something like that. Or a recent favorite from the new metro: “Safety comes from minding frivialities.” Which is true. I just never would have thought to say it like that.

4) Cheap Services: 1.3 billion workers, mean cheap labor, and cheap labor means $5/hr massages, $2 haircuts, and 50 cent hemming. And also 50 people a block yelling at you to buy a fake Rolex and North Face. I’ll take the good with the bad.

3)My Kids: No, I don’t have any illegitimate children (yet!). I mean my students. They never cease to put a smile on your face, even if you know they are not listening to you during class, or saying things like “hello pig,” to you. They are always excited to share any bit of English they know, and that is both heartwarming and gratifying from the teacher’s perspective.

2) The Food: Chinese food is so varied, cheap, and for the most part delicious. Granted there is some weird stuff, but once you know enough Chinese to get around, you can avoid the “delicacies” like chicken feet, chicken necks, dog, and turtle penis. Unless you’re coerced to, in which case there is always some baijiu to wash it down with.

1) Shanghai: I’m pretty sure I don’t want to live here for ever (rest easy, mom), but it’s been an amazing thing to see from the inside. It can be an odd mix of BMW’s, swarms of bicycles, street food, beggars, smells, but it has the hustle and bustle of a thriving city. Which is awesome. They also just opened up like 5 new metro lines, so it’s fun to see how fast China really can move sometimes.

Ok, I think that pretty much sums my life up. I just bought an electric bicycle, which may be the demise of me, but dammit I’m going out in a blaze of glory if I do. Happy 2008!